Walking on this endless road....

When i think back into the past, thought of how i used to be in Primary school. Quiet and often bullied by schoolmates around me. I was even bullied by my form teacher and i still remembered her name up till now. Apart from these ordeals (none generated any phobias in me), i do also got to know many nice primary school teachers and i still remember their names. Mrs Paula Tan used to be my mathematics teacher who did simple calculation on the board with funny sounds and gesture. Mrs Ong used to be my art teacher who brought me out of the classroom and scolded me (not loudly but softly) for using vulgarities freely in class. Mr Calvin Tay used to be my Primary 4 form teacher and also my physical education teacher as well. A very nice guy but can be fierce at times and his signature looks like an illustrative drawing of a bird (if u know what i mean, think juvenile). Ms Koh Gek Kiang used to be my Chinese teacher who left the school when i was in Primary 5, she left a very deep impression on me and the last day of her teaching career, she played the song "guan huai fang shi" on recorder for a few of us to listen. I saw tears in her eyes and likewise, me too. I know where she stayed but not sure if she has moved. Ms Siti Zhubaida used to be my English teacher, very soft-spoken person and extremely friendly. Mrs Yeo used to be my music teacher, she is fierce but we all liked her because she treats us really nice. Mdm Yong also used to be my music teacher, a rather old lady but very approachable. Mrs Nair used to be my science teacher who is by far, the best teacher i have met in Primary school. She invited us to her house in Yio Chu Kang, a bungalow and i was amazed by that humongous living room she had. That was also the first time i knew of the existence of that kind of house. During my Primary school days, i don't like to study at all and i hate morning classes. The only happy moments in school were buying malay food from the canteen, nuggets, chicken kebah and chicken platter. My favorite food in school. Block catching was my "school-hood" fun and going to my friend house, Jasrie, who stayed at block 793 in Yishun, used his computer and played games like Titanic. It seems all carefree but who would have expected that my life back then wasn't as simple as what other kids life were like....... In that period of time, i lost my grandfather and uncle..........in Primary 2 and Primary 3 respectively.....

Secondary school days were by far, the period when i learned alot of things about life by observing people and things around me. Groomed by many teachers because of my sister's notorious existence in school hahaha. I was the only student to ever have 5 CCAs in school and did well for my O levels (seemed like a dream that i really did not expect at all). Simple CCAs but you would see me carrying different items, in different outfits and running around the school during certain occasions. Photography, Leo club, Ex-co in prefectorial board, Choir and Northwest CDC junior counselor. The only day when i can go home right after school was monday and all the other days i could only leave at 5pm due to these commitments i had back then. I remembered all my teachers back then and till now i still occasionally head back to pay them a visit. As usual, i would hang out with my friends and play games at their place. I failed my first semester exam because i failed my English subject (in the past, if u fail English, u fail everything). I was disheartened but i worked hard from then onwards and my ranking moves up from the second semester all the way till the end. I have gotten bursary award for my first year and subsequently, scholarship award for the rest of the academic period. I was happy because i could have savings as emergency usage for my mother. I have never spent the money on clothes or necessities but all given to my mother. Perhaps that explains why i looked unappealing at all in those days. My life has always been 10 steps behind the usual people around me. When people are using handphones (those latest models), i am still using phonecards. Those were the kind of life i was in before but of course, nothing to complain about given that kind of a situation my family was in. O levels results were really shocking to me. I really did not expect i would do that well back then. I was dubbed the dark horse for that cohort. Someone quiet and silent who might turn out to be the shining star. True enough hahaha I noted jealously from a few of my friends when my name was announced in the hall as being one of the top scholar in that cohort. But that's alright.

No matter how tough life has been, time will still pass by and no matter how much you have suffered in the past, there is no such thing as "endless suffering"....... there will be one day when all will come to a stop and things will turn around...... it applies to enjoyment as well. When i looked back into my past, it all seems to have happened and ended yesterday all at once...... sometimes i do feel that i have not spent my days in the past wisely (referring to pri and sec school days) but it doesn't matter so long as you are living your life to the fullest from the moment you know that you don't want to regret about anything in life at all......

Quote of the night.....

It is all in the past but still deep-rooted in my memory that time will never be able to take it away from me.....