My hobbies....

I love to sing and the idea of me singing is to communicate my feelings towards a situation, a position that i am in and to someone.... perhaps that's the reason why i love old songs more than new ones..... I don't really have a fantastic voice though hahaha

This song that i am putting here is for my mum..... she may not understand but i know she do know about this.......



Out of tune here and there, i just sing when looking at the lyrics and trying to remember the tune of the song....

How i grew to love astronomy was due to a secondary school friend who told me about Orion.... And apparently i started looking out for information on Orion and subsequently, all the astrophysical concepts of that comes in. Since then, i always wanted to get a telescope and i bought it when i was in Brissie for studies. Here it is, my best companion, Astromaster 70...


This friend of mine is capable of showing me Jupiter and its moons. And also Venus. The surface of the moon and of cause, many many stars grouped together like a globular cluster. I feel a step closer to what i always wanted to be, an astronomer.

During my secondary school days, i did my own studies on astronomy apart from my other subjects that i told. For 2 years, i am more attracted to this than anything else :)

With so much problems back at home, i feel lost and still have to pretend like everything is fine and well infront of my housemates. How bad can this be? I am always in a world of my own, thinking thinking and thinking......about what? Everything but myself...... been really selfish to myself, i am sorry but that's just me :)

Taking every steps like it's always a challenge...... taking every breathe like it will be my last...... in times of need, i do see some friends reaching out to me, i thank them deep from my heart.....

When you think life sucks for you, perhaps u might want to think again..........

Quote of the night.....

Life goes on even when the world is coming to an end..... doesn't make sense? Think through it.......

New image??

Got a hair cut at Central, bought a few clothes and you bet, it is singlets hahaha. This is my new hair and perhaps a darker skin color if it is noticeable hahaha

Went for a tan this morning and Hell yeah it feels good to be in the SUN!! Love it! My hair kinda attracted a lot of attention in town, perhaps many will wonder if i am a butch or a guy hahaha. Well, i hope a new hair cut will bring me a new beginning in life, i feel good without the fringe battling my eyes.

Quote of the night...

Under the shines of the eternal flare
May all sorrows of the shadows dissipates
In the beam of the white goddess at night
May all moments of light be etched in memories......

The word "Believe"

I am someone who believe in things, who believe things happen for a good cause and for the bad as well, who believe that we can always bring ourselves further ahead than where we are at now, who believe life in all sorts of materials, living or non - living....... I always believe in everything and anything...... But knowing the nature of "love", i can't believe in creating a love story, it's not just about believing but it's about both the people believing in it together. No point having one person believing that it will work out while the other don't........

So i was pondering over these for the past few days or perhaps weeks..... Thinking about what love exactly means to me......... what is it in "love" that gets my mind going on and on like it never did stop thinking about it when i first met with it......what exactly is the significance of love, other than those that we THINK it is....... So i was all in a messed up state and i start downloading oldies like, "What a Wonderful World" by Michael Buble and "Believe" by Cher.

The word "Believe" didn't really came to me at that very instant because all else i believe in but not love, there are still many unanswered questions to it in me that i want to find out and discover about. I always tell people, just believe in things will work out fine and all sort of "Believe" filled sentences but never did i thought that it actually SHOULD be applicable to me as well.

so the very next day, i came back from school..... as usual, walking aimlessly and listening to my ipod, playing love songs. And when i was about to hit the lift button, there i saw a band and as i looked closely at it..... a silver plate with the word "Believe" curved on it....... and i was smiling and giggling at myself...... "Why didn't i think of that? " "Really dumb Ernest!!" ......... so i bring the band with me where ever i go...... here is the band....

What are the chance of it? Perhaps many will think in a more superstitious way but i don't feel so........ it does connect somehow...... i hope the word "Believe" doesn't just resonates in me but in everyone i know....... "Believing" is a very powerful action, perhaps that's only to me..... and of cause, we can't just sit on the sofa believing things here and there, hoping all will turn out good and smooth......When you believe and you put in effort while setting yourself a goal, the outcome is self-satisfaction......which is really hard to come by, that's what i feel.

Maybe it all sounds crap and like there isn't a link or it's just a coincidence etc but somehow to me, it tells me a message, just like all my dreams had told me and they happened........

Quote of the night......

Life is short by years
Slow by months
Still by days
Endless by hours
Speedy by seconds

Nothing beats living every second like the next hour never comes, living every day like there isn't a calender that tells the month and living every year to the fullest by spending every day of the 365 days given to us each year...... to be happy and to feel blessed........

Is it love or something else.....

Hmmmm, just came back from the Brisbane River again...... Was playing the swings and our butts were apparently to BIG to fit into the children sized seats. Then we played with the see-saw....i was being "trapped" at a height and we were having some fun over there. And the most romantic part is after the thrills....... A hug and hearing the heavy breathes of each other in the silence..... My dream of walking in the park holding each other's waist....... cold night yet so much warmth......i don't think it's love although it seemed like it is but i feel comfortable that's all. Everything seems surreal and when you are back home, you will think, "what just happened?" Like as if you were dreaming.....

I can imagine the years ahead..... 2 years before "expiry"....... I believe this 2 years will be well spent not on a 24/7 basis but once in a blue moon.... that's i guess how sweet memories remain as sweet as the very first time we met......... The idea of being single.... what are the benefits and the down sides of it? I don't know but i feel that being single, u are honest with your own feelings, u tend not to "cheat" on yourself too much.... maybe i am wrong but somehow it more or less "lingers" around that idea.

2 relationships, 4 years of effort, 4 years of dreams, 4 years of wishes and 4 years of pain..... what were the outcomes of writing that part of my story? To have people toying with your feelings and thinking that you are stupid.

The best scenarios that i have ever wanted came true with someone whom i considered a "gift", who proved to me that," Ernest, these people that you have always wanted to have, do exist..."
A friend but not yet a lover, perhaps it wouldn't be...... challenged by the places of origin we came from..... But somehow i will remember those times we had together because i know, unless you "suggest" it, it will never occur to you.....

Quote of the night.....

There you are.....

I look into your eyes,
with our foreheads touching each other.
Letting out light breathes,
Hearing the slow beats of our hearts.
As I looked away from your mesmerizing eyes,
You held my chin and left an eternal kiss on my lips....
Till the last moment of parting yet again,
A last kiss for the day i left on your lips.
Till the next time we meet, will it last till then.......

Days of my life....

Hey, how is it going??? Hope all are fine and well for you guys back in Singapore. Here's a glimpse of what i had been up to recently :)

Rendang curry chicken seafood mix with vege!! Here's the ingredient. And after the process of cooking, here's what we had. TADA!!

REALLY TASTY!! I will want to cook for THAT person someday but i don't think spicy food attracts THAT person..... perhaps in my dream i guess :)

And here's another dish for another day, i had this to my own self!! HOT AND SPICY!! I love it when i sweat all over eating that!!

Can't stop being a CAMWHORE!! haha, well after dinner, it's always a routine for me to hit the gym for an hour or so. Gym has since became my second home :) Monitoring my progress but still as small size though haha and here's a glimpse of what's underneath the singlet....

hahahahahahahahaha how is that? Well not many people knew about my profile, i guess it should be alright :x hahahahah train and train and train and train!!!

Back to what's up in my mind. Been really busy with school homeworks. Reports after reports and tests as well. One by one, as the day passed by, they are cleared away from my sight. Did rather badly for one of the subject i am taking but an inspirational speech by the course coordinator pushed me on and got me thinking, perhaps i did not work hard enough and yes i did not but not anymore!!!! JIAYOU!!!

Hmmmmm...... there were certain "things" that were not abled to occur due to the nature of working in the business sector over here in Aussie. Apparently, 24/7, it's all about work and till late hours. I hope i can still "experience" that romantic scene again and well time is the factor..... A simple message of "i have been thinking of you today" brightened my night. Although it's just for today, i believe that's how sweet things remain sweet. It's like saying "i love you" everyday, somehow it causes that phrase to loss its significance........... but deep down inside, i yearn for the day to see you again......

Quote of the night......

In our life, what we see are always the postive side of it, be don't see the negative side of it just so to hope for the best in what we do and what we see. Have you ever thought that having the image or thoughts of the negative side of life can bring you the beauty of life as well?? Life ain't always about being optimistic but pessimistic as well because it prepares us for the worst and that we don't fall badly to ground zero when things didn't work out to our expectations, with a optimistic mind. Being pessimistic is just like seeing yourself at ground zero and imagining the consequences of that to your emotional states....... that's how i see most of the things in my life......well different people have different ways of handling the ups and downs in life, but if one doesn't work, why not try other ways of looking at it :)

Walking through time....

Let's go through some pictures (I think i am the only one visiting my blog hahaha)

How's that? It's really tasty, we called it the Sambal Chicken Prawn Platter haha, i want to cook this for someone, the RIGHT one......

Another meal for another day, i made the Chicken Breast Simmered in Teriyaki Sause on the left of the picture. Very very tasty and again, i will want to cook this meal with the RIGHT one... haha
Hmmm, my all time FAVORITE Aussie fast food, FOOT LONG SUBWAY MEATBALL!!! *Applause* okie that's lame. Anyway, look at how nicely it was prepared? Done by a guy :) Nice and tasty!!
Nothing much, just thought this was cute haha :) and i love MILK!!

After taking dinner, i will always head for the gym. PUMP IT UP!! And this is what i will become after spending 30 to 45 minutes in the GYM!! :) This was a few days ago.

Hahahaha, camwhore!! Monitoring my progress :P.... What a way to say it haha. This was a few days ago but the days after the first one that was taken haha a bit of tongue twisting over here haha.

This was taken today :P hahaha. Same settings, always in the lift.

In the morning it doesn't seems like it mean anything. But when the night comes.... this is what you get...

We get 2 lighted hearts, one small and one big hahaha, sweet isn't it :)

A surprise yesterday..... an egg with 2 yolks, a TWIN chick embryo.... what are the chance of it?

Today is again, a very special day for me..... the same dream re-occurred to me and in a different setting..... Along the Brisbane River, is a Park, under the myriad of stars and the full moon hanging near the horizon...... a hug, a kiss and a word of, "I hasn't seen you for so long"........ :)

Quote of the night......

Life is like a Bus-stop, some times it is crowded and some times without a soul. Understanding that life isn't always at its peak, there are times when we experience the "thrill" and "worries" as the roller coaster plunge from its peak. We all have our fair shares of experiences and problems, some worst and some rather copable..... the more we should know, we are always under the influence of the nature of life.......all but a phrase that vaguely advices a person, "Take it easy"....

Take care of me?

Do you know, the best way to take care of me is to not lie to me..... just be genuine and with no motives under the sleeves of yours. Nowadays, it's really hard for me to trust people, it's just like when you first bought a set of monopoly, assuming the game is new to you. Would you know how to start playing it without first reading the guide? What i am trying to imply here is, when you first see a person, someone whom you have never met before. Would you say,"i want to take care of you"? It sounds like there is a motive behind it. Who would believe that?

Here in Brissie, love in a foreign land. Controlling my feelings from pouring out but yet i feel nothing but comfort from your messages.... i thank you for that. You are just like an angel sent from above to ease the pain of loneliness in me and in you i saw the same feeling i felt as well..... :)

Quote of the night....

Somethings are worth waiting and anticipating for. The lesser you think about it, the more likely it will occur to you. Simply because the more you think about it, the more likely it will become but just a dream....... just like wishes... how often did your wishes come true? And how often does the things that you spent little or no time thinking about, come true?? Think about it.....

The feel of nothing....or so it seems?

Seems like i am becoming a changed person..... I feel really weird these few days. Less emotional? Or perhaps, a wish have came true for me 2 weeks ago..... and seriously, nothing beats that so far..... Well, i guess this is life. Everything seems surreal and uncanny.... went for a LONG jog in the evening searching for that place but i just couldn't find it. Like it has magically "disappeared" and in fact i was lost......but i still do know how to track back home. I am still thinking about and feeling that moment in time.......i miss you....

Quote of the night...

Love is like a pair of dumb bells, we wouldn't know how heavy they are until we hold them up. When we learn how to lift them, there may be a point of time when we know we can't hold them any longer, that's when we learn to let it go in a proper manner, without spoiling the dumb bells.......

Ernest